dinsdag 22 september 2009

adventures in ireland

so this trip had a few firsts for me. it was the first time i really planned to travel by myself. it was the first time i slept in the houses of strangers. it was the first time i ever hitchhiked.

i never even considered hitchhiking as a mode of traveling, but the girl i was staying with in moycullen, a small village in the west of ireland, suggested it. i told her that in the states its drilled into our heads that its illegal and dangerous and to never do it. but in europe it is accepted, and she said it's safe and really easy; especially in these villages away from big cities. i wanted to go out to this region called Conemarra which is known for its beautiful landscapes, but she and her boyfriend were busy all day, and buses are too irregular, so hitching was the best way to get there. in the morning when i was getting ready to go out i was nervous, and considered changing my plan to a safer, more boring one, such as getting a ride with her to the city and walking around looking at the shops, drinking cappuccinos, finding somewhere to eat lunch; basically all the things i did in the other cities. but since i wasnt really impressed by those activities, i decided to go through with the more adventurous, slightly scary plan anyway. and i'm so glad i did; it was so exciting, and easy, and a great way to see the country. all my drivers (i got around 6 different rides) had something to say about the area, and they were all really nice and interested in my story.

somewhere around 20 cars drove by me without stopping. most gave a gesture with their hands that expressed something along the lines of, 'sorry, its not gonna be me'. i had my new camera on me, which i think helped my case, since i'm obviously not some bum with 500 euros hanging around my neck. my first ride was at 830am, after holding my thumb out for about 15 minutes. so the guy asked where i was going and i told him the name of a village all the way on the coast, about 80km away. he said its my lucky day, he was headed to work in that same village. alright, i was happy that it was so easy, but also a bit nervous, because, well, here i was in the car with a total stranger who picked up a young looking girl, and he's a big guy, and we're kinda in the middle of nowhere. conversation didnt really flow easily. i dont know if it was his accent, or he was tired, or shy, but it seemed like some of his sentences didnt really finish; leaving me to nod my head while looking out the window. but he told me if i wanted him to stop so i could take photos, just to say so. he then explained that he just picked up his first hitchhiker a couple weeks ago. he usually avoided it because he didnt want to feel forced into conversation with someone. the first guy was a rough looking english dude with a big scar on his face. but i guess something about the experience was good enough for him to try it again. anyway, we had about an hour in the car together, and towards the end he woke/warmed up and we got along better. he stopped at this one well known vista point for me to take pictures while he smoked a cigarette. then when we got to town he pointed out the visitor's center, drove me round the main drag, pointed in the directions of the next towns, showed me the restaurant where he's the chef, and offered for me to come in for a bowl of soup or cup of coffee later if i wanted. he was very helpful.

so i got out of the car, wandered down to the visitors center, and saw the sign that theyre closed on weekends during september (this was a saturday). great. but there was the bus timetable on the window which would be helpful in getting me to the next town. clifden, where i was, isnt very big. i figured it could entertain me for a couple hours tops. but the buses run very, very infrequently, and only back to the city that i was trying to avoid, or to this national park that i really did want to see - but that bus left 6 hours from then, and would only give me couple hours before i'd need to take a bus from there back home. not a good plan. so, i start walking around. to skip ahead a bit, i ended up walking 8km south along the coast, or near to it. it was beautiful landscape all around, and the weather was also beautiful. cool, sunny, pretty white clouds, perfect for walking and taking pictures.

anyway, i get to this beach and i figure im getting close to the next town which was supposed to be 9km from where i started. there's a nice looking older couple walking from the beach back to their car and i ask the lady if she knows how far ballyconeely is from there (cuz i really had to pee, actually, and wondered if i'd make it. but i didnt mention that to her). she wasnt sure, but she told me to wait and she went to ask her husband. she came back and said its still about 4-5 miles. (they switched from miles to the metric system in 2002, when they became part of the EU, but most people over 25 still speak of miles) i thought that couldnt be right, but thanked her anyway. she asked if i was driving. i said no, walking. she said, oh, is that so. well, you be careful now. so i said thank you, and started walking on. about 3 minutes later they pull up in their car and offer me a ride. she said they thought it was later, but that they could take me to ballyconeely because theyre going there too. i wasnt sure what she meant by thinking that it was later, but i accepted the ride in any case. they said they were waiting to go to a lecture at 4pm in the town where i started, but it was just about 130 then. anyway, one minute later and we reached ballyconeely. it was just about 1km away from where we were. they asked if this was where i was going, and i said i was actually going to get to the next, slightly bigger town called Roundstone, another 15km away to catch a bus from there. so she said, well dear, we're going to roundstone, aren't we? no they werent, but they were so sweet that they took me there anyway. they asked about me story, and i told them how i studied memory. the man said, 'oh, i could use you. my memory isn't so good anymore'. then over the course of the ride he asked me about six times where i was staying. and it wasnt to be funny. he just kept forgetting. but he drove well enough. slowly. everyone else passed him. but they were very sweet.

so, i made it to roundstone. i had read about it in a guidebook the night before and it sounded like thered be something to see. but there really wasnt. but i had to pee, and thought it'd be a good place to grab a bit and a cup of tea before i found a bus back to the city. i saw the busstop, so i looked at that first so i'd know when i should be back there. well, wouldn't you know that the buses dont run through there on saturdays. nope, mon., wed, fri. and sun. only. and theres no other towns big enough for a busstop for at least a hundred km if i kept going in the direction i was headed. so my safest option seemed to be to go back to where i started. but first i ate and drank and rested my feet while i mulled it over. i really didnt feel like walking back the way i'd just come, since i'd seen it all and taken photos of it all, and it was a long way back. but it was also a long way to anything else in the new direction. but i opted for the new, adventurous, unknown path. there were enough people in the town with cars, and i thought most would be heading to the city, even though i didnt know just how long it'd take to get there. but since it was such a beautiful day, and i had enjoyed walking so far, and i'd gotten so many great pictures and knew i could get more, and there were so many times when i was in the car with the old couple that i wouldve liked to stop to take photos but didnt because i had to pee, that i decided to just keep walking until i got tired. so i did that. i guess i walked another 5km before i reached a crossroads that seemed like a good place to catch a ride. a few cars drove past before an old man in a lexus stopped for me. he said he was just going down to the angler's return down the road, but i was welcome to go that far. i had no idea how far that was, but went along anyway. he asked if i was taking photos, and commented on what a beautiful day it was for photos. i think it was my camera that helped him to stop for me. anyway, he mentioned this art opening he was on his way to see before he went to a lecture in clifden a bit later. there was an arts festival in clifden that weekend, so all these old people were going there for various workshops (my observation, not his). anyway, i guess it was a mile or two before we got to the Angler's Return, which is a B&B with an art exhibition going on. he said its kind of a quiet road, but i shouldnt have much trouble getting another ride from there.

it was another very pretty area, so i kept walking and taking photos. i walked and walked, and came across some open hills that i realized i could use as a shortcut. i startled some sheep at one point. and i startled myself shortly afterward when i stepped in a big muddy patch. i was hoping it wasnt a big poop patch. but the lack of smell, and the amount of other soggy, muddy patches helped me put together that i was walking through bog territory. my host mentioned that there's lots of bogs out there. anyway, i decided to get back on the road to avoid more mud. by this point my shoes were squishing and i felt that if i kept walking like that then blisters would start forming, and that wouldnt be fun. so i found a nice spot to sit on a bridge over this private fly-fishing stream. it sure was nice out. i took off my shoes, rolled up my pants, and pulled out an apple and some olives from my backpack. after awhile i walked on, until it was foresty. i was faced with another decision, to stay on the main road i'd been walking, or take this cool looking road into the forest. well, sticking with my motto for the day, i chose the unknown and went into the forest. i learned that it was the property of this really fancy looking hotel in an old castle that gave permits to fish in the private stream (only fly-fishing was allowed). after another 1 or 2km i started wondering where i was headed. i saw another older couple walking down the road. they were picking blackberries (there were so many blackberries throughout the whole day). i asked how far to the next main road, and he said not too far, half mile or so. she said if i got hungry i could eat blackberries. i thanked them, and hoped that his distance estimation skills were better than the first old man's. well, he wasnt too far off, and i eventually came upon what looked to be a main road. but there were no signs pointing to the next town, so i wasnt even sure which direction was the right one. i used the sun, which was going down and made me a bit nervous because that meant it would soon be colder and darker. i thought it'd be harder to hitchhike in the dark, so i decided to try to catch a ride right away. well, that didnt turn out to be so easy. cars were going fast, and not slowing down. so i kept walking, hoping in the right direction. i saw a car a ways down the road, with people and gear, and it looked like they were stopped for awhile, like for hiking around or something. so i went up to ask if they had a map and could tell me where we were. it was a group of 4 girls, getting ready to camp for the night. they took out their map and showed me where we were. they then pointed to where they saw me sitting on the bridge while i was drying my feet out. they were amazed that i had walked as much as i did, and asked if i had a tent or sleeping bag. i said no, and they seemed concerned because i told them where i was headed and there was no way i could walk there before dark. but it turns out i was on the road that i wanted to be on, the one that's a straight shot back to the village where i was staying. i told them that i wouldnt be walking all the way, that i would hitch back. then some cars were coming, so i held out my thumb but no one stopped. the girls seemed concerned again. i said it should be fine, i'd gotten plenty of rides already, someone was bound to stop. some more cars were approaching, i held out my thumb, no one stopped. the girls started to offer to drive me somewhere, then they said, oh, wait, someone stopped. i looked behind me and a car had stopped up ahead. so i thanked the girls, and ran up to the car. it was 2 guys in their 30s and a dog. they said they could take me to the next village, oughterard, which was the one before where i needed to go. great, i'll take it. so it turned out to be about a half hour drive, and the dog rested its head on my lap the whole way. they had all been out hiking at the national park that i would have liked to go to, but didnt. they were nice guys, and couldnt believe how far i had walked that day. anywy, they pointed out my best spot to get a ride to my village.

so, after 5 minutes of trying from there, a young polish guy with a french accent stopped and took me to moycullen. he was on his way to galway, the city that i'm really glad i didnt decide to spend the day in. but from the village, it was still about 4 miles to the house. and by now it was dark, and its a narrow, winding road. i really could have walked it, but decided it was safer to try to hitch. but it seemed harder in the dark. cars had less time to react, or they didnt want to stop, i dunno. but soon enough a car with 2 young guys stopped and took me to the house. i finally made it home a little more than 12 hours after i had left.

it was an amazing day in so many ways. overall, i learned some things. i learned that my physical endurance is greater that i thought. i learned to have faith in myself and others. i learned that choosing the unknown path led to pleasant and interesting situations. playing it safe would have been boring and fear would have only gotten in the way of some great experiences. i knew that i wouldnt find myself in a situation too dangerous, or too far away from other people, and that if i really needed something these other people would help me. all the helpful people i came across really made my day that much more special. and in all the moments in between i felt so good about myself for going through with something without knowing how it was going to turn out. i just trusted my ability to adapt to circumstances, and follow my instincts, and i have a greater sense of confidence now. and i learned how to use my new camera, and i love how it feels to capture all the beauty i see around me and be able to share it with others.

so, that one day was one amazing day that i plan to carry with me every day from now on.

here are some photos: http://picasaweb.google.com/kendallicious77

donderdag 17 september 2009

in ireland

well, i sit in cork, ireland, about the halfway point of my trip already. at this time tomorrow i'll be in the city of galway which sits on the west coast. i've heard nothing but how amazingly beautiful it is, so i look forward to that. i started my trip in dublin, on the east coast, and stayed with a guy who i met through my master's program in amsterdam. he lives in dublin most of the year, but travels a lot and somehow spends a lot of time in the netherlands, too. i had a full 24 hours in dublin, then jumped on a bus to the south where i started my first couchsurfing experience. but right before i got on the bus, i hit my head so hard on the door to the baggage holding area underneath, and it was bleeding the whole ride down (4.5 hours) and still later into the night. i figured i'd wait until morning, and if it didnt close up i'd go to a doctor and get stitches if necessary. but this morning it feels like it finally scabbed over, so thankfully i didnt have to find out if stitches on the top of my head would mean shaving part of my head.

so i spent today wandering around cork. its really not a very exciting city. i probably would have enjoyed taking a day trip out to some castle or something. But!, i did do something worthwhile, and i've spent the last couple hours enjoying it. i finally bought myself i nice digital SLR camera! i've been reading about them, and finally decided to get the nikon d40. the price range is one of the lowest, but it has everything a beginner really needs. so i first started lookin in dublin; went to 3 different camera shops but they all told me it's been discontinued and i'd have to find one second hand and if i did i should grab it because its a good camera at a good price, but no one had one second hand. i had pretty much pushed that one out of my mind then, and didnt even think about looking for any here. but i was walking down the street, saw a camera shop, and a sign on the door said 'nikon d40 special sale'. so i went in, they had 5 or 6 left, and an amazing deal! for 479 euros, i got the camera, a lens, an extra battery back with AA adapter (in addition to the 2 lithium batteries that come with it), a 1gb memory card, a nice case, a remote control, and he even threw in the european plug in addition to the uk plug that it came with! so i started setting it up right away, and am still learning how to do everything i want to do, but i really look forward to using it on the rest of my trip. i think the most beautiful parts of ireland are still ahead of me, so hopefully i can figure out how to get the best pictures.

i'll be staying with a couple in their 30s who live in the countryside a bit outside of galway. they sound like nice people in a pretty area. so i stay there for 2 nights, then go back to dublin for a night before i fly back home on monday morning. i'll post pictures shortly after i get back!

dinsdag 4 augustus 2009

time to get down to business

well, job hunting isn't going very well. i just haven't seen anything that i want to do. and when i think about settling for something less than ideal, i can't even muster up the motivation to apply for it. so the farthest my short-term plan has gotten is to go to ireland in the next few weeks and come back with a 3-month tourist visa. then i couldn't say what i'd do if nothing happened by then. maybe i ought to consider moving back to the states if i don't get a job by the end of the year? i know it wouldn't be that bad to move back, but i just don't feel ready to leave amsterdam yet.

so i was talking to this girl on saturday on top of a houseboat, just after the gay pride parade through the canals. she's an american living here about 2 years (i've been here almost 3 years exactly) and i asked what kind of visa she has. this has been my question to almost every american i come across, lately. i've been hoping to hear about some magic and easy way to keep living here that i haven't heard about yet. well, just so happens she told me about this magic and easy way to keep living in the netherlands. well, she sure made it sound pretty easy, but it's also something totally new to me and, therefore, scary.

there's this thing called the Dutch American Friendship Treaty (DAFT). it basically allows an american to start their own business here with pretty undemanding demands. as a sole-entrepreneur, you just need 4,500 euros in your bank account, to submit a business plan and get it approved, then make a minimum of 10,000 euros a year in order to get renewed for the following year. and after talking to a couple people about it, they're very lenient with everything. so this girl writes freelance articles for a couple newspapers and websites and so forth. she's just submitted her application, though, so i'm curious to hear how it goes. i oughtta ask how long it takes for a reply. knowing the dutch it'll take quite a few weeks.

but i started thinking about what kind of low budget business i could start. and the idea of selling cookies kind of kept running through my mind. just to see if it could work, i'm gonna do a mini trial run. i'll make a couple batches of cookies, take samples to a couple places for them to try, or to try selling, and if they like them they can contact me to place an order. have i mentioned that i make a really good chocolate chip cookie? ive had several people tell me its the best theyve had, and im pretty sure its the best ive ever had, too. it's got it all. crispy, golden brown edges, soft and chewy center, with a sprinkle of sea salt on top. they could definitely sell themselves. so, i know there's a lot that would have to go into this. but i could see it working. ive received some good advice already from several people, and i have a few leads to find out more about running your own business as an american baking from home, and ideas of where to try selling them. im also thinking i ought to include in my business plan my barista skills. if i make it a cookie and coffee kind of operation, i could make a way for people to find me if they want a barista for special occassions. i heard they can get paid 50 euros an hour for a private party.

in any event, its an exciting opportunity, and would be a good experience. we'll see what comes of it. its something to focus my energy on, and it motivates me more than anything else ive considered over the past several months.

so yeah, i'm planning on going to dublin next month. i was there once 5 years ago, and loved it, and have been wanting to go back ever since. and, it just happens to lie outside of the schengen area, which means if i fly in and out, my passport will be stamped and i'll get a new visa that lets me stay in holland legally for 3 more months. i just signed up on couchsurfing.com to start looking for couches to crash on while i'm out there. it would be my first time couchsurfing, but i just had a couple people stay with me who have been couchsurfing around europe and love it. its safe and easy and fun, and the best way to go if traveling alone, especially. and flights to dublin are extremely cheap in september, so thats a bonus.

and on a totally unrelated note, i just have to mention that i'm reading East of Eden, by Steinbeck, right now, and im loving it. i think it will be the longest book ive ever read, and i only have 200 pages to go, and i'm sad that it's almost over. its so well written, totally absorbing. i just have to tell everyone to read it.

ok, tomorrow i'm gonna make my first batch of cookies for business purposes. and run some other business related errands, and do some business related research.

donderdag 2 juli 2009


we're having a little heat wave here this week.  i guess its been around the mid 80's and humid. not too nice when you have to bike to work, then stand around in a kitchen with a hot oven, a hot dishwasher, and several refrigerators giving off heat.  at least theres a walk-in freezer that i can stand in for awhile on my break.  

work has been so-so.  some days are bad and i cry and want to just walk out on the spot. others, like today, go so smoothly that i hardly mind being there at all, except for the heat.  certain days are just so busy, and there are too many things to be done, and too many people telling me to do too many different things, and it just feels so disorganized and the customers get impatient and demanding and i just break down and cry.  i have a new respect for waitresses now, i can say that much.  anyway, i guess it will get better as i keep learning the ropes.  but i hope i find a real job soon. although there's nothing on the horizon.

but we're settling into our new place pretty nicely.  all the floors and walls are in place, finally, appliances are in and working, i have a real bed.  we still need some furniture pieces, but im pretty happy with things here.  

im going to daniel's tomorrow after work for the weekend.  he says he's been swimming a lot lately, so if the weather stays the same i can probably look forward to that, too.  it'd be nice if we have the beach by his house to ourselves.  

im using my roommates laptop because mine is temporarily dead.  the power pack cord/ac adapter is broken so even if its plugged in, theres no power to the computer. and the battery doesnt last more than an hour on its own, so i ordered a new power pack thingy. it should arrive by next week, so in the meantime i'll be spending much less time online.  its nice, actually. i can check my email at work, or at home like now, but i dont waste as much time wasting time on the computer like i tend to do.  instead i walk around in the evening, or write letters, or other more productive things.

now im gonna finish making the tabouleh i started a bit ago.  pictures of the house will come soon. i'd rather wait until its more complete before posting them.

maandag 8 juni 2009


ive worked 3 days at bagels and beans so far, and im so much happier there than i was at the bakery. its such a different environment, with younger customers, (slightly) older coworkers, more experienced management, a busier pace, better products, better music playing in the store, nicer neighborhood, i suppose i could keep going. something i appreciate a lot is the variety of tasks to do. my first day i was at the espresso bar, which i loved, then the second day i was a waitress, which was my first time ever trying that out. it was a bit overwhelming, having to speak to customers in dutch, learning the table numbers, and getting to know the computer system to punch in the orders, but it went really well. yesterday i did a little of everything, and tried making a couple sandwiches, but thats gonna be the last thing to learn. it was so busy during the lunch rush, im a bit intimidated by it all. but they encourage you to eat and drink throughout your shift, so that you dont get hungry or thirsty. and theres so much to try. so far ive had generous amounts of carrot/cucumber/apple/orange/ginger juice, or various combinations thereof, lattes, cheesecake, fig cake, avocado and tomato bagel sandwiches, salmon sandwiches, and other little tastes of stuff. and they have cleaners come in every night to clean the floors and bathrooms, which i was very pleasantly surprised to learn about. today i go work at another location, so we'll see how that goes.

and by next weekend i should be all moved into the new apartment. they put the floors in my soon to be bedroom on saturday, and yesterday were going to be doing the living room. then the main thing is to get the fridge and stove in, that should happen saturday. i think it'll be really nice, so i look forward to getting settled there. pictures should come soon.

zaterdag 23 mei 2009

life update

ok then. yesterday i told my boss at the bakery that i want to quit. my first month was a probationary period, and i'm taking advantage of the opportunity to end it at that. its just not worth it to me to work so hard, for so many hours, for so little pay. so ive been looking into other possibilities that pay better and schedule their employees for more humane hours. but i'm still scheduled for another week and a half at the bakery, unless she's able to find someone to cover my shifts sooner.

but, ive made a decision on where i'll be living next! my good friend, iris, whom i studied with, just got a great apartment through the social housing system in place here, (check out this story in the NYTimes: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/03/magazine/03european-t.html ) and she gets to move in on june 1st. that just so happens to be when i need to move out of my place now. her boyfriend is eventually going to move in with her, but he's still doing an internship in new york for another 6 months, so she asked me to live with her until then. its a recently renovated apartment on the top floor of a building right in the center of the city, with an attic and a terrace/balcony. i think it'll be great, although since its recently renovated, its also completely empty and will take some investing on her part to make it nice. but i look forward to the months ahead there.

donderdag 7 mei 2009


i went to visit my boyfriend a couple weeks ago. he lives in another city near the german border, about an hour and a half away from here. he just started his phd there so we're trying the long distance thing, and so far so good. he actually lives outside of the city, among some nature reserve. its great, there's even a beach that you can walk to from his house in 5 minutes. and all around there are wild horses, and wooly cows that the dutch call bison. one of his roommates has this little black dog, kenny. he's surprisingly adorable for a little dog. but the day i went out there, he swallowed a fish hook while daniel was fishing at the beach. he baited the hook with chicken (i still dont know why), and was busy baiting the other hook with cheese, or something else more suited to fishing, while kenny decided to eat the piece of chicken sitting on the hook. daniel noticed the predicament and naturally started to freak out a little. he looked in kenny's mouth, but he had swallowed the chicken and hook completely, and just had the fishing line coming out of his mouth. well, he went to the house to look up what to do, and i urged him to call a vet right away. but this was a sunday, in a small town, and apparently its hard to find a vet who works on sundays within 50 km. he spoke to a vet who said he could either call a pet ambulance (cycling to another city with the dog didnt seem like a good option) who would then take it back to the vet, take x-rays, and if needed, perform sugery, or else he could just wait to see if it passes. she said to feed him lots of bread and check his poops for either the hook or blood. so, thats what we did. she said it could take up to 2 days. which it did. and those were a nerve-wracking two days for all of us, but little kenny was blissfully unaware of anything, except for all the bread he got to eat without even having to do tricks. but on tuesday night he successfully pooped out the hook and fishing line without even a wince or a yelp. we were all amazed and relieved. so, there you go - apparently its quite common for this to happen. good to know.

in other news, ive spent the last 3 days working at a bakery in the neighborhood. i was walking by a couple weeks ago and noticed a sign in the window asking for help. i stopped and, in my best dutch, asked if i needed to speak good dutch to work there. the girl hummed and hawed and said, in dutch, yeah, most of our customers are dutch, blah blah blah... anyway, i threw out some of my most practiced dutch phrases, and told her i live nearby and have a totally open schedule, so she took my name and number and said she'd think about it. well, a couple days later she called, made an appointment for an interview, and the day after that i started working there. my shifts are from 7am-5pm, 4 days a week. that first day was tough, lemme tell you. i havent stood on my feet for that long in years; not to mention getting up that early. and my brain was fried, too, from focusing so much on understanding and thinking in dutch. but yesterday was a little better, and today better still. i didnt mention that i will have to quit in a few months at the most, but i got a 6-month contract anyway. the pay is minimum wage, but its better than nothing. but minimum here is 8.42 euros/hour. not bad, although i guess i'm out of touch with what it is back in california nowadays. last i remember it was $6.75.

anyway, i see the situation as a way for me to make some money, and most importantly, practice my dutch for 10 hours a day. i'm hoping maybe in a couple months my dutch will be good enough to apply for a 'real' job that requires dutch knowledge. maybe? we'll see. its also an interesting insight into dutch people, their habits - both social and dietary. i think dutch people are much friendlier than most of the customers i ever helped in the states. everyone is so cheery and polite, and there's only about 1 or 2 people a day that come in while on their cell phone.

i was hoping to get to play around with the baking equipment, but unfortunately there isnt any in the store. they have a main bakery location that bakes everything for all the stores, and its delivered daily. we just reheat the bread in the ovens in our store. so i slice bread, make sandwiches and coffee drinks, and clean and sweep and sweep and sweep. the bread crumbs just dont stop. the girl i work for is 23, and owns the place. she owns 4 stores actually. her great grandfather started the company back in the day, and now its a franchise with close to 20 locations, i guess. but she's fun, and patient with my struggling dutch, but is very good about speaking to me in dutch most of the time. im actually pretty surprised at how well i can get by with the customers.

alright, tonight i finally have the strength to cook a proper dinner, so steak and risotto it is. then its back to the bakery at 7am tomorrow.